Stalking is Way More Fun than You Might Think

Listening: Speeding Cars - Imogen Heap

Innumerable things have happened to me in the past week, and somehow... none of it warrants discussion. Ever since Piano Music Is Not Condusive To Improving My Mood, I've been trying not to post blogs of when I get emo. They always turn out so whiny and self-centered and when I read them over I get emo again and blah, I just hate it. But Ben wanted me to write a blog entry, so I did. Yay for me.

But tonight was mentionable.

What lead to the excitement was... less than desirable. You would think that my mother would have missed me after being out of town for a week. At least, that's what I assumed. Of course, that wasn't the case. The conversation we had when she actually got home this saturday went something more like this:

Icarus: Hi Mom! Welcome home!
Mom: Hi. ...You've gained weight.
Icarus: ...*sigh* Nice to see you too.

I hate when she does that.

Tonight wasn't much better. After a truly horrible day, Cole and I went to the mall to shop for Christmas gifts, which was really just our excuse to get the hell out of our respective houses to bitch about being emo. Things were a little stiff at first, because we were both still feeling down, but we cheered each other up before too long.

Then we spotted Leather Jacket Kid.

Allow me to take a moment to explain. In the few months we've been in school, Cole has fallen madly in love with a sketchy (yet distressingly attractive) male from her Biology class, one with shaggy brown hair and a perpetuating leather jacket. Due to her utter lack of guts in regards to members of the male sex (sorry, the attractive members of the male sex), Cole hasn't even gathered the guts to ask his name. I've taken it upon myself to do this (and hopefully actually introduce them) before classes end for good on the coming Friday.

So we were sitting in the Food Court when suddenly Cole, in the middle of a sentence, starts gawping like a goldfish on a sidewalk. Bemused, I glanced over my shoulder, scanning the crowd for what I could only assume to be a loose pack of rabid allosauruses, or an army of robot ninja weasels. Finding neither, I looked back at her, raising both eyebrows in question.

"Ohmygodit'sLeatherJacketKid," she exhaled. Seeing as it was all slurred together in one gasp, I wouldn't have understood the statement from most people. Cole is different. I could understand her if she spoke in Dolphin.

I looked back over my shoulder and studied two young male specimens strolling past. At this point, I would like to point out that I had never seen LJK's face, and I can therefore be forgiven for turning back around and saying, "What, guys wearing leather jackets?"

"NonoNO, fucktard, it's actually him." She gestured wildly, and I spun back around, realizing that this sighting was, for Cole, comparable to seeing Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster, only about twice as unlikely.

Sure enough, I recognized that mop of shaggy hair, which I had observed at great length from Cole's distant LJK-watching post in Biology class. She might be a bit of a stalker, but that's irrelevant for the time being. It'll probably come up later, like whenever she makes it to the news. And she will. But back to the story. Yes, it was Leather Jacket Kid, with another jacket-wearing male accomplice who was nowhere near as good looking as he, both of them strolling about with this devil-may-care attitude that you could sense from a mile away. Cole practically liquefied in her seat. I, on the other hand, had more important things to worry about. Like how to figure out the damn kid's name.

I mumbled something to Cole that sort of amounted to "Stay the hell right here while I do some investigating" and bounded to my feet, ready to cause trouble. Being that I am veryverysneaky sir, I ghosted into step behind the two of them and followed them into a nearby store. I have a plan for learning LJK's name, but there was no way I was going to do it with The Littlest Hobo tagging along at his heels, so I hunched behind a display case full of stuffed animals and watched them diligently, ready to separate my prey from the herd.

LJK and his cohort must have been fucking Siamese twins or something because they moved practically in sync. I'd have moved in the instant they parted ways for a mere second, but no, that wasn't going to happen, they were more than content to stand within a foot of each other and make things difficult for the Creepy-Stalker-For-Hire-By-Chicken-Girlfriends peeking at them from between stuffed puppies and ponies. I was almost caught twice, once when I pretended to be investigating my scarf, the second time when I made a flying leap for a display case. They might have noticed me, because they left shortly after that. When I fell into step behind them, they didn't seem to notice. I was tempted to continue the chase, but instead I returned to Cole with the news that my hunt was proving more challenging than I'd thought and I probably needed to go on a Vision Quest in the wilderness for a few days, sans bears.

LJK and his magnetic basketball passed our table a few more times as though out of sheer taunt. Cole and I tried to hunt them down once, but they disappeared after that as mysteriously as they had come. Clearly I have underestimated my opponent. After that kind of excitement, I had another mighty fall in mood when there were "complications" with my getting home and I was almost forced to walk. (It's a long-ass distance, don't you mock me.) It was Ben's idea to write a blog entry, so I guess I owe my current good mood to him.

Leather Jacket Kid Sighting aside, the evening wasn't a total loss: I bought a replacement ring for my cartilage piercing (which I had to exchange after I tried to put it in and realized that I was bleeding because the gauge was a size too big. Pfah.) and a million pairs of underwear. Shopping for thongs really improves a girl's mood. I'm serious. No, shut up, I really am. Now Kelilah actually has an excuse to go hunting for the colour of my panties. Because they are sexy.

Icarus hates celery, but thanks for asking, Benji.

Like the shark, the panda has millions of teeth...

Listening: I Know You Are But What Am I? - Mogwai

So I came back to the Arts building from seeing Cole off today in the Science quad only to discover that I was ten minutes late for Ben's Anthropology class, which I have a tendancy to sit in on. No matter, I decided--I would simply wait outside and doodle until he emerged, since I wasn't getting picked up til 5 anyway. At around twenty to, I noticed a familiar figure lurking around the Anthro doors. Lo, t'was Kelilah! Deciding to hang with my beloved panda, I packed everything up and scampered across the Atrium to join her.

Ben beat me to it. By the time I reached the two of them, they were engaged in an intense game of tonsil hockey, and Kelilah's goalie needed practise. So what do I do? I plunge right in without warning. Because that's what I do. I cause mischief. I'm good at it.

So here I was trying to have a normal conversation with Ben, and in the meantime, Kelilah is attempting to discover the colour of my panties. I was all, "So my mom's out of town and GODDAMMIT KELILAH NO, GET OUT OF THAT." Except it didn't come out like that at all, it came out more like a cross between a nasally "NUUUUUU" and a squeal of protest. Ben, of course, thought this was the best thing since television. He decided he wanted this sound on his computer to accompany the Error message. So what does he do? He says, "Okay, you two are coming over to my house and I am recording that sound. Kelilah, I'm going to need you to keep bothering her so I can get that sound."

Dumb Ben. Of course Kelilah thinks this is a wonderful plan. So wonderful that she wants to get a headstart on it immediately. She continues to poke me, which I respond to by sticking my tongue out at her. Her response? She comes towards me like she's going to lick me.

I fled.

I ran blindly in circles around the Atrium. Several times I attempted to hide behind Ben, which sure as hell did not work. Eventually I fled into an abandoned lecture room. Clearly I have no survival instinct, because where was the first place I went? A corner. Yeah I know shut up. So, of course, Kelilah found me. And then she descended on me like a goddamn panther. When I say that, I mean it literally. She just sort of... panda-body-slammed me right to the ground. By the time she got off me, Ben was in the door laughing at me, and I was curled in the fetal position, babbling indiscernably with my hands clutched over my head.

Eventually I got up, scrambling to escape from the classroom. Kelilah, who saw me coming, of course, because she's a spook like that, decided that it would be goddamn hilarious to try everything again. Once again I sought refuge behind Ben. Bad plan. What does he do? He tickles me. From back-on. I didn't even know it was possible. My God that was horrible. I threw myself away from him as hard as I could and landed on one of the benches in the Atrium. Ben stopped, laughing hysterically and rendered momentarily immobile. Not so with Kelilah. She attacked me for one last shot.

In my effort to escape, I wound up halfway underneath the bench, hyperventilating and squealing while Kelilah went for my exposed derriere. Rather than give her the satisfaction, I scooted the rest of the way under the bench, curled in the fetal position again. Kelilah, undaunted, declared, "You'll never escape us, Jules!"

Ben demurred. "Actually I think she's doing a pretty good job."

When Kelilah's friend Danielle turned up, I hadn't moved. Kelilah had decided that this was all hilarious. "Hey, Danielle!" she shouted clear across the Atrium. "You get ten points if you guess where Julia is!"

My life is a folly. In the best and most loving possible way.

Icarus is drunk on Panda Mystery.

Piano music is not condusive to improving my mood.

Listening: Heart Attack - Nerina Pallot
NaNo Words: Ahaha.

Dear diary. Mood: apathetic.

...No, I'm kidding.

Seeing as I'm locked in a tiny room on the fourth floor of the MUN Library, I figured that it would probably be to my advantage to update my blog. Because what's it been... a week? Yeah, something like that.

On to old news: the tattooing went through without a hitch. Well, I mean, it hurt. It hurt like a bitch. But aside from breaking a nail on the leather of the chair I was in, I survived it unscathed. Now I just need to survive the incessant itching, and I'll be cool.

The emo boat has docked at Port Icarus. Goddammit Kelilah. I love you deeply but you passed your unhappiness on to me like a hand-me-down shirt. My love life is the pits, and I know it. GAH.

Kelilah: Want to come with me to see Ben?
Icarus: ...Not really.
Kelilah: Aw, come on. I'm not letting you stay here!
Icarus: Kelilah you're rad and all but if I watch two people make out today I may just take a swan dive into traffic.
Kelilah: ...Fair enough.

My schedule for Saturday doesn't help. 8-5 at Wal-Mart, 6:30-?? being trained in waitressing.

I think I need something to eat.

Icarus either needs a coffee or to take up smoking.

Life As Usual

Listening: Bravedancing - Rachael Sage
NaNo Words: 9212/50000. Yes I am still behind.

I think this conversation says it all.

.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
Oh man I am so hungry and wanting to shun Spanish today
.:Lady Jadiea:. says:
lol.. want to go forage for food? we have 1/2 an hour
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
Mm foraging
.:Lady Jadiea:. says:
panda foraging ^_^
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
BAMBOO. I mean um
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
I would make the worst panda ever
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
Pandas: Mmm bamboo
Me: OMG CHEESECAKE. NO.
Pandas: Hurrr
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
Actually... that might make me the best panda ever. Because bamboo resources are being depleted
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
And cheesecake resources are not
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
Except by me
.:Lady Jadiea:. says:
this is true.. therefore you shall survive... darwinism at work,
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Got a wishbone where a backbone shoulda grown] says:
Success!

So... Erm. Yes. I get my tattoo in six hours. :D

Icarus has to keep writing NaNo, even if it kills her. Which, at this rate, it will.

Ass Fondue

Listening: Pretty Dress - Rosie Thomas
NaNo Words: 7059/50000

Even as I sit here writing this (in a Psychology course I'm not even taking), BenPanda is sitting beside me, prompting me with scribbled notes on his looseleaf about things to write about that occurred this evening. I think he gets a kick out of reading about himself. But then again, who doesn't?

Why am I sitting in a Psychology class I'm not even taking? And at 7:45 at night, I might add? Because my Pandas are here, and I adore my Pandas. Also, if I blast God is An Astronaut and Mogwai, I can get a fair bit of writing done--especially seeing as how this class goes on for like two and a half hours. Again; why am I sitting in on this class? Because my Pandas have kidnapped me, now someone go call Scotland Yard.

Ben and I sort of spent the day screaming about how it wasn't Thursday yet. I've been tattoo-brainwashed! On account of Ben being all "OMG TATTOOZ" I am swiftly finding myself being converted to his way of thinking. In fact, I may actually be slightly more psyched than he is! I don't even care about the pain. Also, Cole is coming with us! Yes, I finally told her about my getting inked. I think she is looking forward to watching Ben and I have needles jabbed repeatedly into our flesh. Of course it will probably just remind her of the Benteriophages. (Long story.)

Post tattoo-screamage, and subsequently post-classes, I hung out with the Pandas in Ben's Anthropology course, in which we watched... a terribly lame movie. The three of us and the Prof kept laughing hysterically at how terribly bad it was, while the rest of the class stared at us, but... you know, we don't care. Also I want to steal Anthro-Prof's boots.

So post-Anthro, I was kidnapped. Or rather, pandanapped! Ben and Kelilah put me on a scary bus. And we all know how I feel about buses. And if you don't know why, I'll explain some other time. Anyway. We hit Chapters, which gave me the opportunity to check out Starbucks and discover--glory!--their Christmas drinks will be out by the time I go back with John & Co. on Friday. Glee glee glee. I may not have accurately conveyed how addicted I am to the Starbucks Christmas drinks. Chai Eggnog Latte you are mine. I love you better than sex. Remember? Yes, of course you do.

Back to Ben and Kelilah, we got food at the Mall and had sassy panda adventures like we do. By the time Ben realized we were running a bit late for their Psychology class, it had decided to be freezing-ass cold outside. So what did we do? That's right, we went out in the smothering chill to wait for the bus. Goddamn I hate buses.

I now also hate bus stops, because on cold nights, the metal/cement/whatever you're sitting on is colder than the hips of an Eskimo fan dancer. About halfway through the wait, I commented on the temperature of my seat, only the conversation went something more like this:

Icarus: Man I am so freezing ass cold. When the bus comes and I get up, my back end is going to freeze to the fucking seat and I'll have to go home without it.
Kelilah: Oh noes! We'll have to save it!
Ben: Pack it in ice! Or, no, wait. What happens to the bits we can't save?
Kelilah: Ummm. Take them home.
Ben: And cook them!
Kelilah: And make fondue!
Icarus: Okay you two have effectively creeped me out.
Kelilah: This gives a whole new meaning to 'bite my ass'.
Ben: It gives a whole new meaning to a lot of things.
Icarus: WE CAN STOP TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT NOW. OKAY? OKAY.

So because I love my Pandas, despite their horrifying fixation on eating my ass, I am sitting in a Psychology class listening to absolutely farking nothing except for my music. As condusive as it is to the writing process, I can't help but feel like I'm missing out on something interesting.

Oh well.

NaNo Update: Tomorrow is the first write-in, and the first time I'll get to see the NaNoGang since our first meeting two weeks ago! I am so psyched I could put on a penguin suit and dance. I'm really excited about reuniting with Lilly, Mike, Alesandra, and hopefully Melody, and meeting Tael and Trudy if they decide to show up. And I can't wait to read some of the stuff people have written. More sassy adventures in the works? Hell yes.

Icarus happens to think her ass would make DELICIOUS fondue.

Stupid ack.

Listening: Bells for Her - Tori Amos
NaNo Words: 6484/50000

Bleh! Okay first a bit of venting. Two days ago, I had +6k and was told I was two days ahead w00t. But then life came crashing down on me (in the form of a) downtown adventures with the Panda Brigade and b) MUN attacks) and I haven't really had the time to do much more. And there's not much that's going to get done this weekend, because I have school jazz to work on, plus Wal-Mart is a nazi, and I don't want my social life to go down the gutter. So my goal for this weekend is like, 10k. If I can hit that I'll be quite content with myself. My best NaNo writing comes during the week, for some reason, usually after I get into bed. Nothing inspires me like eating chocolate (or Tiger Pops) and drinking tea until 2 in the morning. I can totally pull off 14k by Wednesday, which is my minimum goal (equivalent to 2000 wpd). It'll be even better if I can hit 20k by then. (Which I can totally do; the only person who can purple-prose like I can is Rykea Night, who is retarded in the best possible way.) And since I have Tuesday mornings off, I am totally gonna work my butt off to get it done! Either way, I'll be in a nice, authory mood for Tuesday evening's write-in!

On to other things.

Downtown with Kelilah and Ben (the Panda Brigade) was muchos adventures. We actually went to scope out a tattoo parlor for me. We were so totally expecting it to be a shady spot, but the place looks like the spot I get my hair cut! It's totally high-class, and well-lit, and sterile like you wouldn't believe! Anyhow, the receptionist guy called over one of the artists, who priced my tattoo, and said he'd do it for $100 plus tax. Which was a good deal, considering their starting price is like $75. I was still a bit jumpy over it, but Doug (the artist) was totally nice about it. He asked if I wanted to see some of his work, and I agreed. Of course, he's a wicked artist. Ben asked him to show us some Kanji and some detailed stuff (since my tattoo is runic, and fairly detailed) and we were both pleased with what we saw. I said I needed time to think, so Doug gave me his card. (Holy crap he has nine years experience.)

Because Ben and Kelilah are awesome like that, we decided to go to Hava Java so I could think things out over coffee. Because I am an addict like that. This turned out to be a wicked plan, because a) I was with Kelilah and Ben b) I got in some serious thinking time and c) I saw Erin from Greece there, who was delighted to see me. We exchanged information and are gonna get together sometime soon. Hurrah!

So after we'd finished our coffee (/latte/cocoa de Mexico/bagel/whatever), Kelilah wanted to go to Our Pleasure. Which I had never been in. Anyway. That was an adventure the likes of which will never be so baldly repeated in the presence of little eyes. I will simply say that I really like the flogger they had there, the honey dust was yummy, and Kelilah did not find a replacement for what she had broken. (Which is another story altogether.)

Then we went back to Studio Maxx, where I made an appointment. Yeah, s'right. I have an appointment to be tattooed this Thursday afternoon. Which is intense. Anyhow now I have a week to chicken out of it, though I haven't really been worrying about it ever since I made the appointment. Which is a good sign, because I am a chronic worrier. Anyway, Ben and Kelilah are going with me on Thursday, which is sweet. I'm really lucky to have those pandas.

Then we went to The Magic Wok. Which was amazing. HAHAHA. We ordered three meals and decided to share them around the table--Almond Guy Ding in a Bird's Nest, Chicken in Black Bean Sauce, and Sweet Shrimp Flambe. Ben's chicken came out sizzling, which completely enthralled us. Then mine came out on fire. Which was even better. It was one of the better meals of Chinese food I've ever had. It woulda been even better if they'd had General Tso's chicken. But alas.

So Thursday was a blast. Friday snuck up on me and choked me, in the form of a Linguistics test and a Classics test that I knew nothing about. But then Ben lent me his Pocket Buddha (I don't know what it's actually called, that's just my name for it), and Cole drew me a picture of me being infected by Buddhist knowledge through an army of Benteriophages. It rules. And then I breezed through both my tests! Win!

After I got off from work last night, I was treated to mad adventures the likes of which I cannot accurately duplicate. Let us just say that it involved pizza and a hilariously angry rant about Phoenix Wright: Ace Attourney and how Cole is a superlawyer, and leave it at that.

I leave you with pictures!















Me and my stuffed dragon, Boo. Boo is wicked NaNo inspiration. Yes I am eating a tiger pop.

Due to a suggestion from dear Benji, I've removed the design for my tattoo. Partly because it has an aspect in my book that I don't want to be copied, and partly because, you know, it's my tattoo. Ya'll can see it in person after Thursday, jerks. <3

Icarus incidentally happens to have the best friends ever.

On the first day of NaNo, my muses gave to me...

Listening: Coda - God is an Astronaut

I declare the first two hours of NaNo a raging success. Hallowe'en candy for all!

Things are coming along swimmingly. Chapter One is done, and so far I've become quite attached to Huang Fang, who I've now identified as being bitingly witty, slightly neurotic, and a raging alcoholic, with a fondness for Sinatra and lingerie. I stayed up 'til 2 a.m. with a cup of tea and some serious tunage, and pounded out the entirety of Chapter One. I got over 2500 words down without even trying, so I consider myself accomplished. I've been poking and prodding at my little sleeping beast all day, so I figure I'm somewhere up around 4000 words now. With any luck, I'll be finished Chapter Two tonight, and hopefully be closer to about 6k.

On to the good news/bad news.

Bad news: the backstory/plot that I had been operating with has been effectively ripped to shreds by my all-too-astute friend and colleague, Cole a.k.a. Pharaoh a.k.a. The Yellow Dart.

Good news: through her built-in Bullshit Detector, Cole has effectively found each and every one of my gaping plot holes, torn them wide open, and forced me to change my plot to accomodate them until it was so solid it could take on Hulk Hogan.

The end result: this may actually be a good story in the end.

Bring it on, November. I'll rock you upside and down, just you watch me.

Icarus doesn't have the same fondness for good gin that Fang seems to have