A Little Post-Employment Therapy

Listening: Question - Old 97's

She woke from a dream
Her head was on fire
Why was he so nervous?
He took her to the park
And she crossed her arms
And lowered her eyelids...

Tonight it was finally decided that I would be officially turning in my two weeks' notice at Wal-Hell. There was a bit of a lengthy discussion with a certain parent who was concerned that I would not be getting paid quite as much at Chapters as I am at Wal-Mart, but in my opinion, it's a small, small price to pay for working in a place where you are actually happy.

This was the letter I wrote.

To Whom It May Concern,

The purpose of this notice is to bring to your attention that I have accepted a position at another establishment and will be leaving Wal-Mart. I will be terminating my employment on Friday, July 27^th, 2007, and will no longer be returning for shift work.

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to work for your establishment. I very much appreciate the experience you have given me.

Yours,

Julia

This was the conversation with my therapist that followed.

.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
I'm doing up my two weeks notice now.
Benji - I'll never forget you...theres nobody better than you... says:
lol
Benji - I'll never forget you...theres nobody better than you... says:
"Dear Wal-Hell...fuck you for employing me as long as you did. die in your sleep, hob nob hob nob, fuck fuck fuck bitch bitch bitch die die die, etc. sincerely, the most bad-ass employee you've ever had - Julia"
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
Benji I love you
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
That actually made my night
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
I think I might cry I'm laughing so hard
Benji - I'll never forget you...theres nobody better than you... says:
lol
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
Oh man
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
I'm wiping away tears
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
Of course I can't actually do that, I don't want to burn bridges >.>
Benji - I'll never forget you...theres nobody better than you... says:
i know, but you should write one and keep it...kinda like personal closure, ya know? :P
.:*~Cradle~*:. [Derangel] [Usurper: complete as of 06/07/07.] says:
That is an amazing idea

And far be it from me to defy my therapist. This is the letter I wish I could write.

To Whom It May Concern,

This is to inform you that on Friday, June 27^th, 2007, I will be doing what I’ve wanted to do ever since I started working at that hellhole you call a store. I have been offered a much nicer position with a much friendlier staff at a way more upscale establishment, and the fact that I am getting paid $0.60 less per hour should be an indication of how desperate I am to be rid of you assholes.

Now, it’s not your fault, but the fact of the matter is that the past two years of my life have been squandered in the employ of the world’s most soul-sucking corporation. Sure, a lot of the friends I met and made here are wonderful people, but this store has given me a healthy dose of the worst humanity has to offer, and for ruining my childlike naiveté I will have my best friend Falcon Punch you repeatedly in the jugular. Just sayin’.

I hope this place burns down and all the redneck asshole pessimists I have been forced to suck up to in my one-year-and-nine-month employment cry tears of blood at the prospect of having to spend a day away from it. Hob nob hob nob. I bid this place fuckin’ adieu.

Yours,

Julia “Time To Get My Life Back”

P.S.: Install some windows.

I'll be sleeping good tonight. I love you, my muffins!

Icarus has probably never felt this smug. Wait, there was... no... no. Never.